Day 21 Is it the sunshine?
- At March 06, 2011
- By Roxanne Snopek
- In Life, Roxanne Writes On
- 0
Were the stars all aligned just right? Did I have the perfect balance of carbs, protein and caffeine in my system, with the correct amount of digestion time prior to class?
I don’t know, but my practice was a breeze today. Balance was good, I almost got my frickin’ right knee straight in Standing Head to Knee, Camel was no problem and there was less snap-crackle-pop in my joints than usual.
I’m two-thirds through the 30 day challenge, and I can see the end of the tunnel. I haven’t lost an ounce probably because, well, you know… pie. But I’m so ripped I should be on the cover of some muscle magazine. You know, the one for middle-aged mothers with delusions of grandeur.
So I went home afterwards and got out the pick-ax, spade, rake, secateurs and gloves, and went to work on my 5-years-and-counting, take-no-prisoners landscaping project. The dogs and I enjoyed a couple of hours of sweaty outdoors time.
I’m such an idiot. I wasn’t sore from yoga. But now I’m sore from gardening.
Day 20 Consider Yourself Warned
I’ve reached that stage in an exercise program where my body has reached a plateau, neither improving (as far as I can tell) nor leaving me in a limp puddle of humiliation after a class.
Now, they tell me, it becomes a mental challenge.
NOW it becomes mentally challenging?? I don’t know what that means, exactly. From day one, it’s been a mental challenge to stay in posture when my hamstrings are screaming. It’s a mental challenge just to get to class every day. It’s a social situation, which automatically makes it mental challenging for me. And NOW it’s getting started??
I’m scared.
But I have noticed one thing, and maybe this is what they’re talking about. I’m pretty damn proud of myself. Yessiree, bob, I’ve made it 20 days in a row. Yup, lotta sweat. Lotta laundry.
And I’m not afraid to talk about it. To wear yoga clothes all day, every day, to be make-up free and proud, to casually practice postures while waiting in bank line-ups. (All part of the social challenge referenced above.)
“You run marathons,” I might comment at a cocktail party. “How nice for you. I,” pause for effect, “do yoga. Bikram yoga. The hot kind. Here, feel my abs. FEEL THEM!”
If I’ve had a glass of wine, it can quickly devolve into an anatomy lesson, a sort of reverse sexual assault. Which you’d think would make me popular at parties, but no. Apparently I do something weird with my eyes that frightens people.
Mental challenge, pshaw. It’s a mental challenge every day, just to be me. Bring it on, I say. BRING IT ON!
Day 19 Dig deeper – thar’s muscle under that thar flab.
In a brillliant example of value-added service, my yoga studio provides massage therapy with a magic-fingered woman named Laura. I’ve been going to Laura every two weeks for several months now, and between that and the yoga, my back and neck have never felt better.
So now, of course, she’s trying to get to the bottom (har-har) of my hip problem. Yesterday, before we got started, I showed her which part of my right hip was keeping me up at night. She got into it, explaining about the hip flexors, the tensor fasciae latae, the iliopsoas, where they originate, where they attach to other structures, how they shorten and tighten due to (you’ll never guess) too much sitting.
“So, we’ll work on these today, okay?” she said brightly. She says everything brightly. “We’ll start with you lying on your back today.”
That’s when I realized I should have waxed.
What followed was a whole new kind of pain. I expect it when I go to Laura – a deep-tissue massage is the only way to fly – but these small, iron-like bands apparently rule my groin like little dictators in obscure countries. You don’ like da way I work? I keel you all.
“I noticed some tension in the left hip too,” she said afterwards. “Did you notice?”
Um yeah, Laura. I noticed. That was when I was white-knuckling the sheet.
“Next time, we’ll work both sides then. Don’t forget to use ice tonight,” she continued. Brightly. “You’re going to need it.”
*
Later:
Despite my fear that Laura had unleashed enough toxins, inflammatory products and demons to make me even more wimpy than usual in my practice today, I made it through all the postures. Without gasping, gurgling or groaning, even.
Huh. Could it be? Maybe I really am getting stronger.